Things are looking up. It's a warm, sunny day and I just completed a project that has been making me crazy for about a week now. One of our clients requested some information that...oops...we don't keep track of it that way. Our software won't allow us to keep track of it in the format they need. I've been pleading with my co-workers, beating my head against the wall, being generally frustrated and stressed about the whole thing. Finally, I gave them a reasonable facsimile of the type of data they requested. I've now washed my hands of the whole matter. It's tough to have to be back at work, but it's a whole lot better than losing my job because I'm never here.
I just started a new book, Touching the Void. It speaks to my need to find people who've overcome tremendous odds. Their struggles make my own difficulties seem small in comparison. My most recent inspiration came from a program I watched on The Learning Channel about a woman who was born with tiny little legs and no arms. She became pregnant accidentally. It chronicled her journey through pregnancy and the birth of her son. She's tough, determined and a very loving mom. When I told her about it, my therapist tactfully pointed out the extremes to which I have to go in order to find bigger hardships than those I've faced all of my life, and that I continue to battle.
My emotional state has improved a lot. I'm able to crawl out of my black hole into a slightly smaller one and stop being so depressed and miserable. You know how I hate that feeling sad thing. I'm sure I'll revisit it, many times, but I'm grateful for the break. I'm now trying to re-learn how to stand up straight. If I could start doing yoga again, it would help tremendously, but my energy level is miniscule. Speaking of which, time to go lie down for a while.
